Alexander

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11/12/2015 4:04am

I oftentimes wish I was like a small dove. The kind we see on campus sometimes. With their thoughtful gaze and their careless movements, they remind me of a beautiful person who refuses to let the world and its troubles get to them.

What am I going on about?

Well...sometimes, I wish I could just fly away. I mean, don't we all? But sometimes things happen that make me want to curl up into a ball and worry about nothing but where I would fly tommorow.

I think that'd be swell.

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11/7/2015 2:15pm

A dazed student finally opened the door and set me free. I thanked them and ran off, leaving them to gaze at the empty room in confusion.

There was a girl looking at me in a strange way as I sat down in class today. Come to think of it, I've met her eye more than a few times in the hallways and on campus. Today, I may ask her to sit with me at lunch and catch up in a few classes. I believe her name is @Karena. I'd love to get to know her better.

Before all of this, of course, I ran to Ted. I couldn't believe he'd gone so long without being fed! Had he bitten anyone? Would I find another finger or toe, like I used to in the first few days of our meetings? Had Ted behaved himself, and in return died of starvation? Can a bush die of starvation? I asked myself these questions as my legs pumped harder and my breathing grew stronger, rushing to meet my beloved pet.

He was okay. In fact, he was better than okay, and I was so relieved I collapsed and gave him a hug. That's right. I hugged shrubbery. And I ignored the sideways glances I got from the other students, as well.

After I gave him his daily dose of insects, I was off to class as usual.

Nobody has commented on my absences. Thank God. Now all I have to do is gather up the courage to talk to that girl and ask her to lunch. I'll see what she says. Maybe we'll have something in common. Maybe she's seen the lights, or knows about Ted. Maybe she was part of the failed ghost seance. Eh, I don't know...but I guess I will, because here she comes, walking into class now...my future sight has only positive options, so, here goes nothing.

Until next time.

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11/5/2015 7:53am

I just woke up in the same janitors closet I hid in all those weeks ago. Was it weeks? Or only days? Was it, perhaps, simply moments from the last time I picked up this journal? My fingers are numb...something that blue light did to me...whatever happened to her, when she died...I just relived it. I have no memory of it...I believe my mind is blocking it out, not letting me see. But I feel tired...weak. As if I could just lay here on this cold stone floor forever. But I will get up. I still must check on Ted.

The other two lights have vanished. I have a feeling little old blue Kasey wont bother me any longer, now that her story has been uncovered.

As for the other two? They may have to wait until next Halloween, when they are strong again, to talk to me. To put them to rest, I would gladly re-live their pain and suffering. Their last moments. Just like Kasey. I hope they can wait that long. God knows how long they've waited already.

The door is locked.

I'll bang on it for a minute.

The last entry I have is dated...days before Halloween? But...have I really been gone that long? What did that poor girl have to...have to go through that lasted so many days and nights? Why do I feel so cold, this intense lack of warmth and hope? I wish I could remember, but then it might be too much to remember. It may break me. And the last thing I need to do is cry. Hear, Hear! New student Alexander bursting into tears over a ghost girl and events that he cannot change! I can see the headlines now.

No one has come to my aid. I wonder how long I've been in here, anyway.

I'll keep knocking. Time to put this away and try to move on.

Until next time.

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10/27/2015 4:02pm

I found out the blue light's name.

It seems, as Halloween grows nearer, that these lights have a stronger energy about them. She told me her name is Kasey, and here is her story.

One day, as she walked back from class, homework in hand and shoes squeaking softly on the wet concrete, she found herself in the dark as the sun dipped below the horizon. It had just finished raining, and it was hard to see anyway, but if the clouds nearly darkened the sun, they obliterated the moonlight. Not a single ray outlined her steps as the dark enveloped her.

That's all I've got. I'm working on the purple light, next. It'd really, REALLY help if someone would help me. I'm no ghost whisperer, and honestly, I have no clue what I'm doing except that I'm getting answers.

I got an A on my interview project.

Until next time.

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10/26/2015 7:51am

The lights have returned, and I have a faint idea of what they are. Or rather, who. You see, my theory is that these lights are actually lost spirits, long dead and almost forgotten, drained of energy, only able to manifest itself as the 31st draws near. they are calling to me, they want me to help them. But I don't know why, or how, but I'm willing to try.

I started with the blue light. From what I have gathered, all I know is that it is a faint light that dances on the edge of our minds, and it's blue.

I mean, give me a break, I ask questions, but it's not like I get any answers.

I sit and listen to them as I feed Ted. He worries me, because he hasn't been eating as much as he usually does, nudging the beetles and worms aside before reluculantly gulping them down.

At least he lets me pet him now.

Does anyone have any ghost-communicating tips for me? I...kind of need them, so that these lights will go away and I can enjoy my Halloween as normal people do, crouched crying under the bed with no other thoughts other than fear and tears.

Until next time.

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10/25/2015 10:24am

My professor got back to me on the lights. His response was on a thin piece of black paper, the words in dark blue ink. It was hard to read, but what I saw was "Halloween."

What about Halloween, Professor?! What does Halloween have to do with the lights?

They haven't returned yet, but thats okay. Perhaps the strangest thing thus far is Ted's behavior. His usual casual, short-tempered mood has been replaced. He cowers when I sneak up on him, instead of biting at me in what I assume is a playful way. He glances around frequently, or, I guess he would, if he had eyes. I don't know, I just get that weird feeling that he senses something I don't.

Speaking of things I don't know, I've got a huge test coming up about the people we interviewed. Each student is to share their project with the rest of us, and then we all take a test over them. The professor says it's a class-building exercise, smiling at us through slitted eyes.

I'm half anxious, half scared, and half excited. Three half make a whole and a half. Gues there's too much of me to handle.

Until next time.

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10/24/2015 4:15pm

Something scared me...enough to make me skip classes today. First off, the lights were gone. Did they leave? Go off to torment another free soul? Or will they be back? More powerful, the whispering louder?

Did I mention the whispers? Right up until the end, I could hear them...distant voices, demanding, begging me, "look to the lights, follow the lights, look look look..."

Then they were gone. But that wasn't all. My visions stopped.

I don't mean that they went away, rather, all I saw was a black, fuzzy cloud. Was it death? I quickly spun around and checked again, but still, that dark, cold abyss stared at me. Only seconds away. I ran, in circles, around the campus, trying to do something, anything, to ward off the coming black, the closing in dark. But nothing changed it. I couldn't see the future, all familiarity was gone, all I saw was the black, the wall of colorless nothing that threatened me. I couldn't see, good God, what was going to happen? Is this how normal people saw things? They saw nothing?!

Finally, I dashed into my dorm room, I couldn't breathe, my chest ached, and all I could think was "I'm not ready to go, don't make me go..." I was so scared. What was the dark? I removed my sweaty shirt, crawling under my blankets. What was the dark?

Was I going to die?

My breath came in shallow gasps, and then, each time I almost drifted into sleep, the voices would return, without the lights, whispering, urging me, "awake! Stay awake, Alex!"

No one. No one calls me Alex.

I eventually fought them out of my head, and I fell asleep. I woke later, as the sun was dipping below the horizon. My throat was dry, but I checked...I checked my visions, and in them, I saw myself feeding Ted.

I sighed...then realized I'm missed all of my classes and neglected my journal. So I write this quickly, hoping to get to Ted before he starts his annoying growling. I can only wonder how close death was to me today.

Until next time.

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10/23/2015 3:51pm

So, hey! Great news, for once! I was able to see about three whole minutes into the future! That's the longest ever!

I saw Ted give me a nasty bite, as in, losing a finger nasty. So, I left early. It was wonderful!

I'll need to teach him to be a little more kind. What if he bites someone important on the campus? He might get removed from the premises...so, next trick he learns is "leave it alone." He did learn to speak quite well...but his "voice" is more of a throaty growl than anything.

Ted is so adorable.

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10/23/2015 11:34am

The lights haven't changed much. I'm still waiting for word from my professor, hoping he knows something about them. Anything, really. I'm thinking of asking other students about them...I've gone out of the way to learn a few names and match them to faces in my memory, so maybe I can move onto the next step soon and make friends.

Friends were kind of an oddity to me when I was younger. In grade school, I was the outsider, the weirdo. I was the only one who sat alone at lunch. Probably because as the bell would ring to dismiss us, I'd be the only on ready to leave. I mean, even the kids who dressed in black and flaunted their lip rings, the ones with perpetually half-closed eyes who never gave a crap, had a group to be with and people to sit with. My abilities cast me out. But here, it's considered normal to have this power, so, who knows. Maybe I'll find a friend in the other different souls washed up here. Or maybe I'll be an outsider forever.

Anyway, the whole point of that tiny rant was to confirm that I'm going to ask around and see if anyone else has seen the lights. I'll get back to you on that.

On a lighter note, lets talk about Ted. You know, the biting bush that growls and has several rows of sharp, thorn-like teeth? I've decided to adopt him as my pet. He doesn't have a face, only that large, fang-filled mouth, but when I feed him insects he quits growling. He likes the big ones the best.

Growing up I'd only ever had one pet. He was a goldfish I called Goldy. I was five, give me a break. Needless to say, Goldy and I were the best of friends, and I played with him every day, despite the fact that he only swam in circles and bulged his eyes when I spoke to him. I was heartbroken the morning I found him belly up in his tank. But Ted is not a fish. Ted is a bush. Bushes cant die from age, only from cold or lack of sunshine...or, in Ted's case, a lack of live insects. So I'm confident I'll have a long relationship with him.

I'm teaching him the trick "speak" with one hand and nursing a bite wound from him with the other! It's quite the fulfilling experience.

Until next time.

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10/22/2015 9:47pm

Ever get the feeling that you're being watched? That deep feeling of dread that starts somewhere in your stomach and slowly claws its way up your throat and into your brain, planting a seed of worry and spiking a few adrenaline bursts? You know, the deep seated fear, the agonizing possibility of someone behind you, someone you cant see, something you cant stop? It's almost as if you can whip your head around, catch them in the act...but no, there's nothing there.

What would you have done if it was there, anyway? What could you have done to stop it? It's a basic human fear, really, being eradicated by something unknown, having something you don't understand take control of you, because if you aren't familiar with it, if you don't know what it is, you cant fight it. Like hiding under the blanket, checking behind us is a futile test that serves only to make us feel more protected.

I felt watched, earlier as I walked home late from a night visit to the library. Luckily, it was just that biting bush I mentioned when I first arrived, growling at me. I was lucky this time. I knew what it was. I think I'll call him Ted.

I was lucky.

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