Where am I? What's going on? The last thing I remember was discussing the complex crossed-anions with Heerg'amal in the observatory on interdimensional code AL-43b Earth. Am I still in AL-43b? I think I messed with someone's warp drive and it threw me here. Is this the same Psychik Halles of Knowledge? Is anything the same? Help!

I can't contact Heerg'amal. I guess that means I'm not on the same Earth I once was, and also that this isn't my Psychik Halles either. Let me introduce myself. I am Jessica Gynn. I was born a refugee from the destruction of my planet. My sister survived with her damned pet fish who has since died and been cremated to form the core of my Psychik Channeler. I'm lazy, I call it a PsyStick. It sounds the same, right? I must have left her on my earth. I miss her. I was the only one who could ever see her as well, she must be lonely. I barely began my studies at Psychik Halles when Heerg'amal invited me to see the stars in the observatory. Heerg'amal is my Mentor. She's a Dryad, one who swore to protect those forests not far from our Psychik Halles in my universe. I wonder if they're here. If so, maybe Heerg'amal might exist in this plane? Not as I know her though I presume. Speaking of non-human entities, what sorts of social clubs are there for species of minority?

I apologise for my previous statement where I referred only to "species" as a form of student here. I now recognise that there are plenty of other entities here and have got the picture enough. I'm serious, stop writing on my walls in blood. And whoever that Silver spirit is, please leave me alone. You're making me feel very sick. So allow me to ask my question again (any minority entity groups welcoming new members?) and perhaps direct it a little stronger to @Ekatarina S. as she seems knowledgeable and helpful. That is, if she hasn't been consumed by that Strange Patterns™ stuff.

Dr Krimsborg. Do you have experience with... strange limbs growing in? Unexpectedly? In (well, I thought I was) humans? I need an appointment ASAP. I live with two humans and I cannot deal with this any more. I expect you'll work the same way as my old PGP and that the portal will appear soon. As soon as you can. Please. This message will loop in 3... 2... 1...

*THUNK*

*THUNK*

*THUNK*

That's my new boss. In exchange for living accommodation, I decided to work for Dr Krimsborg, DPM. He definitely needs a helping hand organising this mess sometimes. The good doctor himself is currently slamming his head against his desk. I don't know what's wrong with him, but it sounds bad. I hesitantly approach with the stack of paperwork he asked for, and tap it in between his methodical clunking.

"What is it Jess?" he asks soberly.

"Those files you wanted... I finally extracted them from that damned Consuming Chest of yours."

He smiles a little. "I bought that when I was twenty five, to house all my medical books. People used to use Remote Viewing and steal the books they didn't have. That chest was one of the ways you could protect yourself against theft, you know. Now he's become a little too attached to me and it doesn't like strangers. He'll get used to you eventually. But thank you, I need to review Anita and Utora 7."

I sit down beside him, pen at the ready. "What's the issue today?"

He buries his head in his hands again. "Utora 7 is noncompliant with the medication regime and Anita appears to be having more artistic muscle difficulties."

I bite back a sigh. Utora 7 really ought to know better, and I tell him so. His head snaps up like it's on a spring. "Clients," he says sternly, "don't always know the right things to do. Even when they do they often simply ignore it. Noncompliance happens just too often." He moves his Lenses of Focus and rubs his nose. "We'll need to track down Bobby as well. Get the Interdimensional Police on the line."

I nod, pulling out a fishing rod and casting into the crucible that sits in the corner of the office. As I wait to connect to the board, I keep writing notes. Dr Krimsborg is pacing a lot, back and forth as he tells me what to write.

"First I will deal with Anita. Her case is... somewhat simpler. Anita has suffered creative cramps which was dealt with with surgery. Unfortunately, her noncompliance in the aftercare meant that she now suffers with poor creative ability. As it seems the populace of PsyHigh are very good at being noncompliant, I will provide and dose the necessary medications for Anita myself. She will come to my office twice a week for psychotherapy to improve the circuitry issues and then I will provide a dose of motor oil, five hundred millilitres and Malingnomor, 3 milligrams. These should resolve the issues of creative cramps."

"A side effect of the treatment provided for Anita was that now she has weaponry installed in her body, in the form of staples shooting from her eyes. I will therefore be making a referral to the Interdimensional Police for necessary basic training and safety precautions in regard to this talent."

I'm afraid to say I interrupted him here. "Dr Krimsborg, wouldn't it be better to file a report with the League of Saviours? Their group therapy sessions are very good."

He glances up. "Hmm, I do suppose you're right Miss Gynn. How did you know about them?"

I avoid his eyes. "I went to one of their sessions after my diagnosis."

He looks at me guardedly. "Don't go into vigilantism, Miss Gynn. It's not a good career move for someone... well, like you. I would hate to lose my secretary."

I nod awkwardly. He clears his throat and continues.

"A report to the League of Saviours might help as well." He gestures for me to keep writing. "On the suggestion of my secretary, I will also be making a report to the League of Saviours to assess her for future employment and group therapy sessions with other like-minded and like-able students."

I'm interrupted in my writing by a vicious wriggle on the line. I tug it taut and Dr Krimsborg flexes his fingers. "Thank you Miss Gynn. Hello, can I speak to Corporal Urey and Corporal Dunnings please?"

There's a pause and some shuffling of papers before a gruff masculine voice speaks. "Sergeant Urey speaking."

Dr Krimsborg smiles. "My goodness, hello, Sergeant Fetterman Urey. It's been a while since I last spoke to you. How's the pressure headaches going?"

"Oh my gawd, Dr Krimsborg! Yeah they're almost never here any more. That therapy you gave me saved my career!" Dr Krimsborg smiles at my dumbstruck expression before speaking.

"I'm glad. You're a sergeant now then, eh? I'd love to stay and chat, but I'm here on official business. We've got a controlled drug in circulation around the campus I'm working on, PsyHigh."

From down the line, Urey groans. "What is it?"

"Fantasimiria. And also dangerous use of Spectrata."

"Wonderful. We can do a sweep and drug clear in ten minutes for you, Doc. Who should we be targeting?"

"Utora 7 is dangerously using Spectrata. I suspect she will be absolutely incoherent and dangerous. I recommend riot gear to handle her... I advise taking her to the nearest psychic hospital which is equipped to deal with total loss of reality. Last sighting: four days ago. And according to her notes she gave the Fantasimiria to Bobby Mars. It's likely that, considering Bobby is an alchemy major, he has replicated and sold on the drug."

Sergeant Urey sighs. "Is that all for my division?" Dr Krimsborg replies to the affirmative. "I'll put on Corporal Dunnings for you then, Doc. Stay safe."

"Thank you, Sergeant Urey."

"Corporal Dunnings speaking."

"Hello, Corporal. Dr Krimsborg speaking. I need you to track down a woman called Anita Klue, a student at PsyHigh. She's had a side effect of surgery which has caused her to shoot staples from her eyes. She's a cyborg, you see, and she needs basic safety training so that nothing goes awry."

"I'm on it, Doctor Krimsborg. Anything else?"

"No, that should suffice. Thank you."

I pull the line from the crucible and sever the connection. He nods. "Take the rest of the day off, Miss Gynn. I'm going to close up early today. I doubt anybody will come in after the drug bust."

I nod and gather the notes up. This is definitely one of the weirdest jobs I've ever had. I'm loving every minute of it.

Oh, don't worry @Klarya, I've got some. I went to the League of Saviours with Anita and had a lot of fun! Seeing as I'll be dropping the positive energies down and I've got the list of stuff Dr Krimsborg wanted me to give you for those more unusual students, I'm quite happy to lend a hand with some of the students with complex medical needs. Just tell the students about the whiskers and ears thing, I've been mistaken for a "Furry" too many times. I'm not furry at the moment! It seems though that the whiskers and ears are here to stay. So just... no laughing. I'm self conscious about it.

Anyway, looking forward to seeing you! Depending on how busy the camp is, we could grab a cup of coffee/stellar mash/American ectoplasm. I'll pay :) I actually get paid by Doc Krim, which is cool. I'm curious what you're looking into doing when you leave... you'll come back right?

Oof! Pain shoots through my skull, frying my brain and my Fifth Ear.

I sink to my knees in the middle of Dr Krimsborg's office, clenching my head in a vice grip. Doctor K looks up with mild interest. "Oh," he says conversationally, as I writhe on the floor. "I forgot to tell you about @Calliope Krimsborg. My son, he's coming to the summer camp, the one we're supplying @Klarya with medical supplies for."

I sit up, my head still spinning. My Third Eye seems to have escaped notice, but my whiskers are frazzled to all hell. I try to straighten them with my fingers as I listen.

"Yes," he continued, "his psychic communications are a little stronger than most. Along with lots of other things, but that's a long story. I promised I'd pick him up and take him to the camp, but on the way I had to deal with a sighting of Utora 7, and I told him you would pick him up. I assume he's looking for you now."

I sit upright and Dr Krimsborg kneels beside me. He switches into his Medic Voice. "Take some deep breaths. That's it. I can give you some pain relief if you want, but it's best to battle it out naturally. Can you stand?"

It's amazing how relaxing that voice is. I feel filled with confidence. I stand up and nod. "I'll go find Calliope for you and bring him to the camp."

He smiles, thanking me.

Imagine my surprise ten minutes later to meet a levitating girl looking not a day over ten! "Are you Calliope?" I ask tentatively.

"Yup," she responds, doing a backflip in the sky before floating down to shake my hand. "Nice to meet you Jess."

I'm at something of a loss for what to say, but she breaks the silence admirably. "So, you some sort of furry?"


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God I feel so refreshed after that session with @Anita Klue at the League of Saviours secret hideout. It's only secret because it's cooler that way, or at least that's what they told me on Initiation Night.

It was Anita's Initiation last night, so let me tell you what happened.

We all gathered around in a circle in Psyker robes (they change to suit the occasion for you rather than the other way around - handy) and began meditating.

The elected leader that night - the League don't have a singular leader, only Elders who have the knowledge and understanding to lead us in the right direction (they take it in turns to chair meetings and stuff) - he led us in a chant. One of the Elders released his familiar, a ghostlike dog, who began running around with a bag clasped in his teeth.

Well, I tell you, it made me so woozy I passed out!

As did the rest of the League. It gathered us in a Psychic hall, sort of like a conference room really. We all sat and watched as Anita showed the Elders her skills. She was really good, and it seemed the Elders thought so too, as they led us all in a chant again. It went something like this:

Guide us,
Guide us,
Let us be righteous,

Let us see the True Light,
Let us feel the True Light,
Let us cleanse the world of Blight,

Initiate of gears and steel,
Who has come to us to heal,
Before the True Light now you kneel,

Guide us,
Guide us,
Let us be righteous

And just like that, the Elders came forward and presented Anita with her ceremonial sword and a Datachip which she plugged immediately into her forehead. She seemed ecstatic. I'm really proud of her!

Y'know, Dr Krimsborg has the wrong idea about the League. All of them are really good people who help you get fitter than you'd ever believe and improve your self esteem. The other day when I was a gleaming orange tabby, they bought me one of those cat towers for the common room. I was feeling left out of activities that required opposable thumbs.

Fortunately Lady Legume saw the future and had ordered it ahead of time so that it could be assembled by Argumentative Redhead. She was stressed and needed something of a relaxing project rather than stressful projectiles. Well, I was very grateful and let her stroke my tummy. I think she likes me. She was very unargumentative for the rest of the day, absently scratching at my ears. I like her. She knows just where to itch.

Anyway, I think now Anita is an Initiate, we can hang out more and maybe go on some teambuilding exercises together! They're super cool, one of them is stopping a fake bank robbery! They even have fake guns, it's super realistic and is great for self esteem.

Oh man, that felt good! I feel so refreshed and happy after doing that teambuilding exercise with the rest of the group! They even had a police commissioner guy stand and shake hands with all of us and congratulate us on a successful mission! These missions are great.

I'm just heading into Dark and Brooding 101, so I'll write more later.

It's the Witching Hour, and lately that's made me very tense. I'm curled up in a ball on the bed in my room, trying not to think too hard. Curse that connection of cats and witches!

Dr Krimsborg comes into my room and I sit up. I greet him, but all that comes out is a miserable and longing meow.

"Don't worry Jess," he says, patting me on the head, "the Witching Hour will be over soon. I'll definitely add it to your file: it seems you are fifty-eight percent cat now. Look at your beautiful tail!"

I have to admit, it's a damn fine tail. It's swooshing around me like a little kitty fan, but he's pulling something out of that chest of his. It's a wicker basket with a fluffy lining. "I assume you're unable to read at such a stressful moment," he says, placing the basket down, "but I just wanted to get you something to congratulate you on being Student of the Month!"

I sit up straighter. I want to ask him about it, but again all that comes out are chirps and various miaows.

Dr Krimsborg is nothing if not perceptive, and his mind-powers are sometimes scary. Still, he answers my question as if I had actually asked it. "It's something PsyHigh have done for a very long time, probably since it was founded," he scratches his chin a little, "and it commemorates students who have done amazing things. I'm proud of you Jess, even if I technically have no reason to be."

I knead the bed happily. Seems this Witching Hour isn't going so badly after all. The doc smiles at my happiness, then turns pensive.

"Also, stop bringing in dead mice."