Just to test this, I'm going to respond to the letter of the day in here - this one is from...I can't begin to read this name. Must be an Eldritch student. Anyways...

"V,

Is there any way to get to places in the school really fast? I mean, like some kind of elevator or guaranteed way to move around quick. I keep getting tardies!"


To be honest, I'm not fully sure. I'm not saying I couldn't figure it out, I just...don't travel enough to know. Sorry. If I had to guess, I would say using some kind of underground secret passage would get you from A to B without much traffic. I can't tell you where the entrance is, or the teachers will have my head.


-V the poet

I think it would be easier for me if I directed some of the more urgent requests to the interwebs, so I can respond faster. If you have any inquiries that require my urgent and immediate attention - I implore you to send a message here.


-V the Poet

Why hello there, propieters of Orion ranch!

Is there, perhaps a reclusive, isolated spot in your ranch for a reclusive, isolated poet? I promise I will make it worth your while!

I need a break from my room. I want to go outside. Alone. Free.


What are the requirements for a one week session? Please get back to me ASAP


-V the Poet

@Herbert West


Why, being in THAT organization would allow me to better observe and record the actions of the schools hive mind.

Also, I might have accidentally sent you a letter. Please don't read it if you don't think it's yours. It could be cursed.


Today's letter of the day is from Melissa P.

"Dear Poet,

Why does this school smell so foul! It's like nobody here has ever heard of deodorant! Please answer this for me!"


First of all, call me by my FULL title next time. Disrespectful. Secondly, does anybody remember that scavenger hunt from about two years ago? Well, there are items from the hunt that were never found. One of them produced a particularly...foul odor. It's in one of the vents. Somebody should get it. Additionally, there's a special event occurring in the school involving onions, so pardon me for the wet paper caused by my crying. If you can't handle it...well...just go to the garden? I guess? Most of the place smells good.


Weird how I'm still tired, even though I just slept for months. That happen to anybody else? I think I used all my sick days for all 4 years of psyhigh. Whoops. Sophomore year is going to be terrible!


What can I do.

My goldfish died. I wish I was more sad, but I fell asleep before I could really grow attached. Maybe it's for the best, then. It sucks though. I was actually wondering if anybody would volunteer to dispose of the tank and the body itself. Those bat things keep swinging at it...and it's really REALLY annoying. I will leave it just outside my room. Please, I'm begging somebody to pick it up. I'll do anything.

Ahem... I must also say that, during my sleep, I had a mass writing incident. All the letters on my room were gone. But I don't think the responses ever got to their writers. I'm really sorry. If you think yours got destroyed, try and write another one.

Be mindful of randomly appearing trap doors. They've been popping up everywhere, and nobody is talking about it. I'm worried about one of them leading to the inside of my room, as they seem non-euclidean. I should report them formally...but I'm sure somebody else will do it.

Here's my question of the week - if you could speak any non-euclidean language, which one would you pick and why?

Alrighty, I'm going to sign out. I'll see if I have time to write tomorrow.

-V the Poet

Hello! Salutations! Greetings! Hola! Etc.

Yes, I have returned after my cosmic slumber, ready for more!


If you have any inquiries, feel free to write a letter, send it to the 8th tallest spire in the school.



V the poet

Once again, I'd like to emphasize the importance of fitting in in Psyhigh. Just like any normal school, fitting in is a good thing, but here in Psyhigh, the best of students, the ones that stand out the most, tend to disappear without a trace. I've seen it a few times. Very interesting phenomena.

I feel like there are several new strong students in this freshman year who have potential for greatness. @Starlight, I know it sounds irreverent, but you need to blend in. This applies to all incoming freshman.

Alright, I just popped in for a quick warning. I have a lot of letters to write at the moment.

-V the Poet

Sleep

By V The Poet

Since I woke up, I've been afraid of sleeping

For what lurks in the dark, creeping?

I want to dream, and dream I will

And when I look out from my window sill

I will keep dreaming still

But go to sleep I cannot.

For I have slept so long, yet all my dreams are lost

My slumber coming at a cost

So no matter how tired I am

I will never sleep again.

When you are isolated for a long time, like me, you start asking some strange questions. I have some examples, but most of them involve unspeakable text, which my current keyboard doesn't support. Speaking of which, I have a computer. Well, obviously, since I write posts and such, but I don't think I've ever mentioned it. It's just not that important to me, and I have found real letters to be much more reliable when reality hopping.

I named my goldfish Behemoth. Seemed like a rather funny and ironic name. I like just watching Behemoth swim around without a care in the world. I wish I could do that, but school is really tough.

I've been spending most of my time trying to get back up to speed on what has been happening at Psyhigh in the time I was in my coma.

I kinda wanna go sailing right now, is that weird? I just realized that I haven't seen the water in quite awhile. Maybe I should go outside for a walk. Nah, that's crazy talk. People might look at me funny.

A lot of people assume that I am a very gross, unhygienic human, but that's actually not true. My isolation has caused me to be more hygienic, if anything. I mean, the only person who has to smell me is me, so if I'm not clean, then I gotta smell that. Not fun, ya know? So I'm pretty clean and tidy, well, at least I feel like it. But it's not like I have a second opinion, so. My living space...isn't so tidy. I gave up months ago trying to keep my room tidy after the letters came rolling in every day.

Speaking of which, I'm proud to report that today I wrote a record 18,655 letters today. That may seem like a lot, but when you can write at several thousand words per minute, it isn't too ludicrous. My writing speed has also got faster since I woke up from my little coma. I wonder if I wrote any letters while I was asleep.

I was looking out the window today, as I always do, when I came across something quite strange. It wasn't much, but it really rubbed me the wrong way. A person was going to a treehouse in the woods. I couldn't tell who they were, but I did see that they were wearing green jeans. I'll keep watch and make a report if I see Anything else of note. But for now, I'm just going to enjoy the sunset.

-V the Poet

Hello all incoming summer session students.

I really don't want to introduce myself again, so I'm V. A poet, a writer, a watcher. You can write to me if you want. Don't send it yourself, but wait for the Postman to come to you.

Oh, you don't know how to know if it's the Postman? You'll know. He has that effect on people. You'll forget later, though.

Have a good summer term, everybody!

My last post was my latest poem. It's a little rough around the edges, but I apparently havent written in months. I thought I would have failed my classes, except for the simple fact that, upon checking my grades, I noticed they...improved? How? Am I really that subpar at my studies?

I missed the anniversary of the bat creatures in my room. Seems the had a bat-divorce, as they are living on two different sides of the room now. Seems like they have joint custody of their kid though. Must be awkward. But hey, that's how life is, right?

Relationships aren't my strong suit. That should be obvious. I can't even remember the last time I talked to somebody. My old pal William messaged me. He traveled to the planet Kepler H-2B for extraterrestrial studies, so I hadn't heard from him in awhile. Good to see he's okay.

My goldfish has finally arrived. He's cute, he's a nice orange. He only swims around and such, but he seems happy. It has NOT been easy catching up with my letters, let me tell you. If any of you guys receive letters with illegible or extremely sloppy handwriting, send it back to me and I can return it in 3-6 months.

A frequently asked question people ask me is how I sort my letters. It's honestly really simple. I tell my postman to leave them at the tower door unless I've whitelisted the sender, in which case it is to be delivered straight to my mail slot. If you want to be whitelisted, you can send a request. I will have it reviewed in 1 second to 6 months.

I'm a little behind on the happenings of this school, but I've pretty much gotten caught up. Seems to me like we have a suspicious amount of plant life outside. And the plants look sentient too. Kind of freaky. But oh well, what am I to do about it?